If he faces away from Lan Zhan, he can pretend their beds are a full arm span apart. Lan Zhan's slow, steady breathing as he drops into sleep only sounds louder because Wei Wuxian is a little drunk. The coverlet can provide an extra barrier to stop him from inadvertently reaching out in the night.
It will be fine. Maybe he hasn't ruined it after all.
Quicker than he expects, he joins Lan Zhan in sleep.
He does not remember all his nightmares, and he counts it a blessing if he awakes, terrified, but unable to recall what scared him.
This one is different. He remembers nothing but a horrible blackness, and what drags him awake isn't the images in his mind: it is pain, blistering hot, not the sour stomach of too much alcohol but far, far worse.
Only one dream ever wakes him so.
Unbending himself when he only wants to curl up like a wounded animal nearly makes him cry out. He stifles it on the back of his hand, panting harshly, trying to remember what to do. Wen Qing saw him wake like this once in the Burial Mounds and guided him through. What was it she did? How --
Lan Zhan is still breathing next to him.
No.
If he has to endure being held, now of all times, he will crack apart altogether.
With tremendous effort, Wei Wuxian shoves off the coverlet and stumbles to the washroom.
no subject
If he faces away from Lan Zhan, he can pretend their beds are a full arm span apart. Lan Zhan's slow, steady breathing as he drops into sleep only sounds louder because Wei Wuxian is a little drunk. The coverlet can provide an extra barrier to stop him from inadvertently reaching out in the night.
It will be fine. Maybe he hasn't ruined it after all.
Quicker than he expects, he joins Lan Zhan in sleep.
He does not remember all his nightmares, and he counts it a blessing if he awakes, terrified, but unable to recall what scared him.
This one is different. He remembers nothing but a horrible blackness, and what drags him awake isn't the images in his mind: it is pain, blistering hot, not the sour stomach of too much alcohol but far, far worse.
Only one dream ever wakes him so.
Unbending himself when he only wants to curl up like a wounded animal nearly makes him cry out. He stifles it on the back of his hand, panting harshly, trying to remember what to do. Wen Qing saw him wake like this once in the Burial Mounds and guided him through. What was it she did? How --
Lan Zhan is still breathing next to him.
No.
If he has to endure being held, now of all times, he will crack apart altogether.
With tremendous effort, Wei Wuxian shoves off the coverlet and stumbles to the washroom.